Bad Feminist
posted by bitchphd
Thank god for this must-read piece in IHE today. I very seldom keep up with academic news any more, but an old Internet friend posted the link on FB. It happens that she herself is also an unemployed adjunct, but I probably only clicked it because in my head she's filed under the category "mommy" rather than "academic"--I met her online via a mommy forum--and "mommy" is where most of my identity lies these days.
Which, you know, I'm not all that thrilled about. I'm quite happy with my actual *life*. More so than when I was an academic. But it bugs me that my public identity is so limited. PK will be off to college in 10 years, and what the hell will I do then? I'm fairly happy channelling my training and skills into supporting the teachers at PK's school, but it's K-8; I don't see myself hanging around on the PTO once he's off to high school.
On a day-to-day basis, though, that stuff doesn't worry me much beyond hoping I don't sound like an asshole when I use the phrase "as an educator" during a PTO meeting, or feeling embarrassed when the guy at the plant nursery asks me about the title "Dr." on my debit card. What bugs me more is the feminist problem: having no money of my own.
That and the exchange I had yesterday with Pseudonymous Kid, who wants to be an amateur scientist--ie, to do pure research without being beholden to a university--when he grows up.
PK: But how can I do that?
Me: Well, you can get a different job for money, like working in a restaurant.
PK: But how would I get people to give me money for a lab, or fancy equipment? It seems like the days of the amateur scientist are over.
Me: Well, that's why most researchers work at universities these days. You get a lab and you can do research, but you have to teach.
PK: But that's not an amateur like people used to be.
Me: No. Back during the Renaissance, amateur scientists were usually people who had inherited money. But nowadays, you need to get a job. Unless you want to marry someone rich*.
PK: No way. That's for lazy people. I want my own job.
Me (slightly stung): Well, wait? I don't have a job. Am I lazy?
He's right, though. Amateur educator I may be, these days, but it boils down to the money, which for most of us means a job. Which more and more seems to me like THE modern feminist problem. We live in a capitalist world. With money of one's own, one can buy not only a room, but solutions to most "women's problems." Abortion access? Not an issue if you have money. Political influence? Write a fat check, or several; hell, start your own news outlet (just please make it better than HuffPo). Work/life balance? Hire a housekeeper and a nanny. Domestic violence? Move the fuck out of town, and/or hire a private detective and a good lawyer, even a bodyguard.
But like I said, most of this stuff doesn't bug me in my day-to-day life. Because in my day-to-day life I have a husband with a good job; I married rich. Which is great, for me. But it doesn't quite solve anything on a *systemic* level; after all, if he gets sick of me, or I him, there goes that. I might be able to get alimony and PK (along with child support), but only if he were generous, or if I went through long and ugly court bullshit (and how would I pay for a lawyer?).
If you were thinking, a couple of paragraphs ago, that domestic violence is a little trickier than that, or that having money might solve most of A woman's problems, but that Feminism is more about systemic injustice than whether or not a small group of individual women can buy their way out of (or into) Teh Patriarchy, well, of course. But like I said, on a day-to-day basis I'm good; it's only when I think more broadly, about my public and social identity, that I start to feel like being a housewife, rather than a professor, is a problem.
Of course, even with a job, one ultimately depends on The System, as a hell of a lot of people have been finding out lately. The article above is pointing this out, too: like the newly laid-off middle class, adjunct faculty have been confronting the fact that the personal ultimately depends on the political for a while now.
Which, as I started off saying, is a thought that makes my own personal situation feel a little better. At least in the sense of assuaging my guilt about having "chosen" to leave academia--which I didn't. I just chose to leave a single job. The fact that that decision jettisoned my career? I blame the system.
As another FB friend--in this case, also a mama-academic I met online, but differently; she's a blog reader who, it turned out, was also a buddy of one of my underemployed local PTO mom friends--also pointed out today via a link, the system makes bad feminists of us all.
Which, you know, I'm not all that thrilled about. I'm quite happy with my actual *life*. More so than when I was an academic. But it bugs me that my public identity is so limited. PK will be off to college in 10 years, and what the hell will I do then? I'm fairly happy channelling my training and skills into supporting the teachers at PK's school, but it's K-8; I don't see myself hanging around on the PTO once he's off to high school.
On a day-to-day basis, though, that stuff doesn't worry me much beyond hoping I don't sound like an asshole when I use the phrase "as an educator" during a PTO meeting, or feeling embarrassed when the guy at the plant nursery asks me about the title "Dr." on my debit card. What bugs me more is the feminist problem: having no money of my own.
That and the exchange I had yesterday with Pseudonymous Kid, who wants to be an amateur scientist--ie, to do pure research without being beholden to a university--when he grows up.
PK: But how can I do that?
Me: Well, you can get a different job for money, like working in a restaurant.
PK: But how would I get people to give me money for a lab, or fancy equipment? It seems like the days of the amateur scientist are over.
Me: Well, that's why most researchers work at universities these days. You get a lab and you can do research, but you have to teach.
PK: But that's not an amateur like people used to be.
Me: No. Back during the Renaissance, amateur scientists were usually people who had inherited money. But nowadays, you need to get a job. Unless you want to marry someone rich*.
PK: No way. That's for lazy people. I want my own job.
Me (slightly stung): Well, wait? I don't have a job. Am I lazy?
He's right, though. Amateur educator I may be, these days, but it boils down to the money, which for most of us means a job. Which more and more seems to me like THE modern feminist problem. We live in a capitalist world. With money of one's own, one can buy not only a room, but solutions to most "women's problems." Abortion access? Not an issue if you have money. Political influence? Write a fat check, or several; hell, start your own news outlet (just please make it better than HuffPo). Work/life balance? Hire a housekeeper and a nanny. Domestic violence? Move the fuck out of town, and/or hire a private detective and a good lawyer, even a bodyguard.
But like I said, most of this stuff doesn't bug me in my day-to-day life. Because in my day-to-day life I have a husband with a good job; I married rich. Which is great, for me. But it doesn't quite solve anything on a *systemic* level; after all, if he gets sick of me, or I him, there goes that. I might be able to get alimony and PK (along with child support), but only if he were generous, or if I went through long and ugly court bullshit (and how would I pay for a lawyer?).
If you were thinking, a couple of paragraphs ago, that domestic violence is a little trickier than that, or that having money might solve most of A woman's problems, but that Feminism is more about systemic injustice than whether or not a small group of individual women can buy their way out of (or into) Teh Patriarchy, well, of course. But like I said, on a day-to-day basis I'm good; it's only when I think more broadly, about my public and social identity, that I start to feel like being a housewife, rather than a professor, is a problem.
Of course, even with a job, one ultimately depends on The System, as a hell of a lot of people have been finding out lately. The article above is pointing this out, too: like the newly laid-off middle class, adjunct faculty have been confronting the fact that the personal ultimately depends on the political for a while now.
Which, as I started off saying, is a thought that makes my own personal situation feel a little better. At least in the sense of assuaging my guilt about having "chosen" to leave academia--which I didn't. I just chose to leave a single job. The fact that that decision jettisoned my career? I blame the system.
As another FB friend--in this case, also a mama-academic I met online, but differently; she's a blog reader who, it turned out, was also a buddy of one of my underemployed local PTO mom friends--also pointed out today via a link, the system makes bad feminists of us all.








