Love

Please watch this video. Even if you think Olbermann is shrill or annoying or sexist (all of which he can be at times). I think, or at least I hope fervently, that what he's said here will catch fire as a defense of gay marriage that echoes in discourse all over the country.

It's tempting to characterize the fight for gays to marry as a question of fairness, because denying marriage to an entire group of people is so very fundamentally unfair. And it is, in a very real sense, a question of fairness. But I think the legalistic defense of gay marriage has sort of outlived its usefulness. People are well aware that by banning gay marriage, they are denying rights to others that they themselves enjoy--and arguing that it's not fair doesn't seem to persuade them. Emotional appeals, like the one Olbermann is making, are going to carry the day in the end, I believe.

And his central question, the one he repeats over and over, is the one I want repeated to every person who professes a stance against gay marriage: What's it to you? That is what I will ask, that is what I hope you will ask, that is what I hope religious and political leaders all over the country will ask. I am shocked by the disconnect that religious leaders have caused in the hearts of their faithful. I do not think that the people who voted in favor of prop 8, the people from all over the country who sent money to the Yes on 8 campaign, are hateful. Some of them are bigoted, yes, but many of them are not. They have somehow been convinced that the righteous and loving thing to do is to deny gay people the right to marry. Shame on the people who are responsible for convincing them.

The Mormons (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints or LDS) are taking a lot of heat for their huge Yes on 8 campaign, and they deserve it. I am sickened by the behavior of church authority, and infuriated by the blind obedience of the local leaders in every city, town and state that followed them. Their protestations that they are within their "right" to participate in the Democratic process just infuriates more. Of course they are within their rights. That's not the point. The point is that they nakedly used the people they lead, people who put trust and love in them, to further a political goal that is hateful. In an organization that talks about love more than any other I've ever known.

As I've mentioned many times, I'm an atheist. I was raised Mormon, and I haven't been to church in nearly ten years. But up until a few weeks ago, I had no particular desire to take myself of of the "official" rolls of the church. Somewhere in Salt Lake City is a file with my name on it. In that file is the record of when I was baptized almost twenty years ago now. In that file is the record of the tithes I paid as a child from my meager allowance. In that file is the transcript of the patriarchal blessing I received when I was 16. And somewhere in that file are the names of my beloved parents. Somewhere else in Salt Lake City there is a file with my mother's name on it, the beautiful, talented, brilliant woman I never really got to know. And in that file is the transcript of her patriarchal blessing, and her baptism.

All these things were some strange comfort to me. I've said that one of the things I would most like to talk to my mother about is her relationship with the church, and how she reconciled her problems with it. Because it's hard for me to reconcile what I know about her with what I know about the church. But as much as I dislike the institution, I have always maintained that the wards and branches across the country are full of good, smart, loving people.

Not today. Today the institution and the people that are part of it have come out against love. They have come out against the chance for love. And because I am pro-love, and will strive every day to be more so in my romantic relationship, my friendships, my family bonds, my career, and my service to my community, I must be against the LDS church.

So, by the end of this week, I will be officially resigning from the church in explicit protest of the church's behavior on Proposition 8, and its insistence on dragging the good loving people who follow its teachings into a battle against love, the last great hope for happiness and peace.

(For those who can't watch video, the transcript of Olbermann's comments are there. But really, if you can, watch the video).